Living Abroad With A Host Family: The Homestay Experience
Fried fish for dinner. Every. Single. Night. Getting chased around Spanish parks by horny men. A missed ferry to Morocco.
These are all stories I heard from my mom’s study abroad experience in Spain. Nightmarish? Intriguing? I guess that’s for you to decide.
When I went to college I didn’t know if I would change my major. I didn’t know what I imagined my career would be like in the future. I didn’t even know what cuisine I wanted each night at the dining hall (too many choices!). But one thing’s for certain, I knew that, above all else, I wanted to study abroad just like my mom did when she was in college. Every time she would talk about her study abroad experience in Spain, she would mention one of three things: 1) Everything her host mom made her for dinner was fried. And most of it was fish. 2) Spanish men. They adored her. So much so that they thought chasing her around the parks every morning would get her attention (totally not creepy at all…). And lastly, 3) She missed her opportunity to travel to Morocco because of a faulty alarm clock (or perhaps, exhaustion?). These stories, though chaotic, were a huge reason why I wanted to study abroad. I wanted to have my own adventures in a new country, one that I could call my home. And I knew exactly the place…
Years before my first international trip abroad to Rome, Italy in 2019, I would find myself in an AP Art History course, with a inspiring teacher named Mr. Patrick. Though I was creative and artistic, I had little attention for history of any kind, even if art was in the name. Really, my high-achieving self just wanted the “easy A” in a seemingly fun class about art. Little did I know, I would not only fall in love with the subject, but I would also learn to appreciate the fact that history and art were intertwined in the unique way that one could not exist without discussing the other. History shapes art. Art behaves like a visual manuscript of the time period in which it was created. I would become an expert at deciphering from which time period came what art. Mr. Patrick’s passion for Art History, and specifically Renaissance art, sparked a new passion for myself. I knew that the best way to chase this passion was to live in the place where the Renaissance was believed to begin…Florence, Italy.
“Studying abroad as an undergraduate engineer is certainly not traditional”
…my Biochemical Engineering counselor would say to me, any time I brought up my dream of living in Florence. I was puzzled. Studying abroad seemed like a universal experience for college students.
When given the opportunity to live in another country, why wouldn’t you decide to move abroad?
I guess this wasn’t the case for engineers. It seemed like the odds were against me. Due to the difficulty of the engineering coursework and the “strict” four-year schedule for engineers, studying abroad wasn’t built into the schedule. Nevertheless, I would find a way to live in Florence, even if I was plagued by challenges (haha, get it? The plague?)!
So I made a plan: my career could wait.
There was no rush for me to graduate (other than my financial struggles). I didn’t want to chase the nine-to-five immediately after graduation. That would be a trap. Traveling was my only option. The best course of action was to complete my four years of engineering coursework, then take an extra semester at the end to study Art History in Florence. This allowed me plenty of time to save money and prepare for a semester living in Italy.
Un cappuccino per favore! Italian coffee was some of the best I have ever had!
Ciao from Italia! My study abroad experience in Italy was the most amazing four months of my life!
Everyday I would walk by Brunelleschi’s monumental Duomo!
At the top of Giotto’s Bell Tower (Campanile di Giotto) is the best view of Florence’s beautiful Duomo!
travel tip for students living abroad
Bring more money than you THINK you need! See note below 🙂
My program had a budget for students living in Florence that I thought was unreasonably high. After all, what’s a scholarship student going to do with her hard-earned study abroad savings? Gamble away her money at Monte Carlo? Sip fancy cocktails on the French Riviera? Because I was living in a homestay and most of my meals were included in my tuition, I thought I had the ability to create and stick to a strict budget. By strict I meant, $500 per month!! But I didn’t account for the fact that Switzerland was a short bus ride away from Florence. Or that I wanted to take day trips to see other Italian towns like Pisa or Bologna. There’s a reason why most students have a three-day weekend: to take weekend trips! If you plan on spending your weekends traveling to other cities/countries, make sure to include extra money for these adventures! And don’t forget souvenir money!
The time came for me to register for my program and choose my accommodation. Like most students I gravitated toward apartment living. I feared that, like my mom who studied abroad before me, I wouldn’t enjoy shared meals with my host family. And my favorite thing about traveling is trying new foods, so I needed a good fit! However, I needed to take a chance on the homestay experience. Many people had shared how their host family welcomed them as if they were a part of the family. I wanted that aspect of cultural immersion, so I could better learn the language and understand the culture.
I took the leap and I chose the homestay experience! Much as I suspected, it was the best decision I could have made to make the most out of living in Florence!
It was the middle of august and Florence was experiencing one of the hottest summers on record. Today was the day! I would get to meet my host mom, Valeria, and move into what would be my home for the next four months!
My program transported me to a beautiful Florentine apartment complex just on the outskirts of Florence. I looked up at the relief columns and cream travertine stone, realizing that I was living my dream. My host mom appeared, a beautiful old Italian woman with curly white hair, and a welcoming smile. I hadn’t started my Italian class yet, so I knew nothing about the language. I smiled and nodded to show my gratitude and excitement.
With my luggage and I tetris-ed to fit in the small, one-person elevator, I was excited to see my new home. The apartment was a traditional Italian apartment – a small living area with a large window, from which I could see Piazzale Michelangelo on the horizon, with two bedrooms and our parlor surrounding it. Pictures of Mama Valeria and her two kids, fully grown and living their own lives, were scattered throughout the kitchen. My roommate and I would be sharing a bedroom; a parlor converted into a two-story loft where we each could have our own “room” in an open, shared space. It was beyond anything I could have expected. And judging by my Italian professor’s reaction to the amazing location of my homestay, we got lucky with our placement!
Mama Valeria would prove to be the most kind-hearted, hospitable Italian woman I had ever met. Although she spoke no English, and communicating proved to be quite difficult, the Italian I learned from my language class, and throughout the city proved to be beneficial in conversing with her over delicious meals. There was no shortage of pasta in our homestay and every meal was accompanied with gelato or cheese and honey for dessert. We were truly treated like royalty! Unlike my mom and her deep-fried homestay experience, I enjoyed every single meal cooked at the homestay!
My first weekend in Florence, Mama Valeria took my roommate, Bryn, and I around to see all the beautiful sites in Florence. We started at Piazzale Michelangelo, one of the most beautiful viewpoints in Florence. Mama Valeria then drove us to the Tuscan hills to a small town called Fiesole, where we explored an ancient Italian amphitheater. At this amphitheater, Bryn and I bonded over our love for skiing, and realized just how close our colleges were back home in the states…only a short drive away! At the end of the day, Mama Valeria took us to her favorite gelato place, Gelateria De’ Medici, which happened to be just steps away from our accommodation…lucky us!
Gelato was an everyday staple for me when I lived in Florence (if that isn’t a sign to pack up and move abroad, I don’t know what is…)!
My homestay experience was truly an epic experience; one worthy of making my whole personality about. I had the opportunity to live in one of the most beautiful cities in the world and travel around Italy and Europe during my four months abroad. Unlike my mom, I enjoyed every meal shared with my host mom. And I met so many inspiring travelers and students while studying abroad! And luckily for me, I only missed one flight (but I still made it to Amsterdam in case you’re wondering)! If you are a student planning to live abroad, I hope my success story ignites your curiosity for travel and living abroad!
Here are a few tips for making the most of your cultural experience when living abroad in a homestay:
Learn the language
Chances are, your program will require you to take a language class. Don’t miss it! It’s surprising how much quicker you’ll learn the language hearing it spoken all around you versus trying to learn via Duolingo (sorry Mr. Owl!). Knowing some basic phrases (i.e. how to introduce yourself, how to order food, basic greetings) can take you very far!
Research the country’s culture before traveling there
You know the classic American breakfast shown in movies where the kid says, “I’m running late mom, see you later!”, and leaves a full table of pancakes, eggs (every style!) and other breakfast items scattered all over the table? That classic American breakfast doesn’t exist in most parts of the world. Most Italians will eat a small pastry with a cappuccino for breakfast. I missed the “traditional” American breakfast when I lived in Italy! Had I’d researched the culture before I went, I wouldn’t have been so shocked by the minimalist eating habits of Europeans when I arrived. There are many reasons why you should do research before traveling. But the bottom line is two words: culture shock. It can be prevented. Don’t give anyone the opportunity to shake their head and express distaste for your home country!
Eat every meal at home
Crazy to think that some students didn’t eat at their homestay every night, right? Mama Valeria cooked the absolute BEST MEALS I’ve ever had (even better than most restaurants!). There’s a reason why the homestay experience includes daily meals! Food brings people together. At the dinner table is where I learned most about Mama Valeria and her family, regardless of the language barrier. Take advantage of any opportunity you have to eat with your host family. When my boyfriend visited me in Florence, Mama Valeria gladly welcomed him into her home. It was a special experience getting to involve my boyfriend in my study abroad experience!
Spend some weekends in your host city
There’s a lot of pressure to spend every single moment of free time catching a flight or exploring a new city. The first week of my study abroad classes I was so shocked that many of the students had already grouped and were planning their weekend trips for the entire semester! I felt completely left out. Not to mention, I had to be strategic about my spending considering my tight budget.
But then I realized something valuable. In their earnest attempt to escape Florence every weekend, those people who were trying to fly all around Europe would miss out on a lot of opportunities right outside their doors!
This is a PSA to all students studying abroad: explore your city! Save some time to enjoy the little moments in your host city, rather than always jetting off to another country for the weekend.
Florence had so many opportunities for me to discover! I got to see Michelangelo’s David, as many times as I wanted. Every Monday after class I would get a frappe, a frothy, chocolatey milkshake and walk up to Piazzale Michelangelo to watch the sunset. I was creating a wealth of memories walking around MY CITY, rather than missing the little nuances by escaping to see OTHER PARTS of Europe. Find your balance. Not only is that excellent life advice, but it’s a good thing to remember if you move abroad.
If you love the meal, get the recipe!
Pesto pasta with potatoes. Pumpkin risotto. Spaghetti with clams (my favorite!). Mama Valeria could’ve been a Michelin-star chef! Her cooking was amazing. So. Freaking. Delicious. Every day after exploring Florence I would look forward to her home-cooked meals. I loved them so much that I even tried to recreate them at home!
Express gratitude and be respectful
Hopefully this tip is a no-brainer! Your host family has welcomed you into their home. Make sure you express gratitude in your host family’s mother-tongue! That way they see your effort to embrace their culture.
Enjoy your time spent with your new family abroad! Time flies when you’re having fun!
